Always in a whirl, from homemade bread to housework to work-work. Come join the fun, the mess, and don't be afraid to tell me if I'm not making any sense!

Monday, November 1, 2010

Wow, we've been busy! October is gone, November is here!

We've been carving pumpkins...

We discovered that Able loves rainbows nearly as much as apples...

No surprise, but Charlie loves firetrucks...

We trick-0r-treated...Seb went somewhere else, so no pics of him!

We've been crafting a lot, but now it's time to focus on the Christmas gifts.

Some of us have found the need to sleep...

Super Charie has come into existence!

Somebody had a birthday.

Tony is very antsy for snowmobiling season.

Oh, yeah, we carved some pumpkins! :)

And Charlie got a new bed. Every night it's like a Where's Waldo cartoon, he has this need to bring everyone to bed.

I hope November is half as much fun!

Tuesday, October 26, 2010

2 Giveways!

Mamaroots is giving away the November edition of Herbal Roots Zine and Herbal Roots Zine is giving away one of Mamaroots amazing creations! Head on over to these two sites to see how you can win!

Tuesday, October 19, 2010

Be the Peace you Want to see in the World

Sometimes it is hard to be who you want to be. I find myself tired, my husband in an ugly mood, the toddler is sick, I forgot to eat...and then I act in ways not my usual normal. This movement comes at a very important time for me, it's a good reminder to be the mom/wife/employee I want to be, and who others want to see. My children deserve a loving, warm, strong mom. My husband deserves for me to the port in the storm I need in him. I really need a job with a schedule, not these crazy shifts all over the place, and the best way to do that is to continue doing the best I can at the hospitals where I already work, and then when a shift opens up they will think of me.

So. My intention is to continue striving every day to be that Woman that I know I can be. To love my family, to smile, to work hard. And to continue to find new ways to cope with stress, as I'm constantly advocating to my patients. I CAN do this, and knowing that others are doing this makes it easier.

Do you want to join us?

Sunday, September 26, 2010

Calendar of the Soul 25th and 26th week

Twenty-fifth Week (September 22-28)

I can belong now to myself
And shining spread my inner light
Into the dark of space and time.
Toward sleep is urging all creation,
But inmost soul must stay awake
And carry wakefully sun's glowing
Into the winter's icy flowing.

Ich darf nun mir gehören
Und leuchtend breiten Innenlicht
In Raumes- und in Zeitenfinsternis.
Zum Schlafe drängt natürlich Wesen,
Der Seele Tiefen sollen wachen
Und wachend tragen Sonnengluten
In kalte Winterfluten. Calendar of the Soul

Twenty-sixth Week (September 26, 2010 - October 02, 2010)

O Nature, your maternal life
I bear within the essence of my will.
And my will's fiery energy
Shall steel my spirit striving,
That sense of self springs forth from it
To hold me in myself.

Natur, dein mütterliches Sein,
Ich trage es in meinem Willenswesen;
Und meines Willens Feuermacht,
Sie stählet meines Geistes Triebe,
Dass sie gebären Selbstgefühl,
Zu tragen mich in mir.

Friday, September 10, 2010

{this moment} Friends on the First Day of School, and A Reflection

{this moment} - A Friday ritual began by Amanda at Soule Mama. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment you want to pause, savor and remember.

Thursday, September 9, 2010

Apples Apples Apples

We brought home a LOT of apples from Hubby's mom. Thanks, Nana! Saucing a bunch up today, we'll have fried apples for dessert, and we'll see if there are any left. I doubt it, they taste so yummy.

It seems that there is always one mascot apple that I'm loathe to cut up. This one probably weighs a pound and a half!

How many people have a birds nest on their dinner table? This one was found in one of the apple trees where we picked the apples. I need to find it a home. (Excuse the back to school pile of papers...)

We don't have a nature table, at least not right now. The one we were using became my chairside table. I do try to keep some things about the season on the center of the dining room table, though. And thanks to Mamaroots, we have a new friend this month! Abel Loves Apples. He's been given his own harvest and pumpkin patch to care for. A friend has a scroll saw that isn't being used, and has promised it to me. When it arrives Abel can have a few apple trees to care for, too.

Family Trip to the Zoo

It was amazing. We had a wonderful family adventure to the zoo, and nobody melted. The weather was cloudy, and occasionally drizzly, but nobody got cold. We were all full of smiles. Nobody complained about the food from home (fried rice, full of veggies, packed into a tiffin box, thank goodness for the carrier, it was still warm.

These pictures of the kids were taken in our Zoo's new Serengeti exhibit. But really, this a true snapshot of our life. Babybug is ALWAYS zooming around. That boy is a mover and a shaker. All of my kids fascinate me, who they are becoming, who they've been, and where that is leading. They are amazing, all of them. I get the older two, they are a lot like Hubby and I, however, the little one...he's an enigma.

The chase continued around a big ol' baobob tree in the courtyard for several minutes. It was hilarious!

Hubby and I were having fun, and maybe he looks a bit tired here, we were waiting for the train to start. Babybug has this look of awe and wonder that I adore.

Caveboy rides again, with his side kick, Cavegirl. Really, they are in a log in the Pacific Northwest exhibit. But pretending is fun!

This was the beginning of Caveboy in 2009. He crawled into some rocks on the lava flow and we discussed how it must have been for prehistoric man to live in a cave. So ever since he's been Caveboy! Cavegirl didn't get to go on that adventure, she was busy doing other things, like fishing. Ever since, I never pass up opportunities to call him Caveboy. Hee hee.

Sunday, September 5, 2010

Calendar of the Soul September 5th

Calendar of the Soul

[September 05, 2010 - September 11, 2010]

Twenty-third Week

There dims in damp autumnal air
The senses' luring magic;
The light's revealing radiance
Is dulled by hazy veils of mist.
In distances around me I can see
The autumn's winter sleep;
The summer's life has yielded
Itself into my keeping.

English translation by Ruth and Hans Pusch

Es dämpfet herbstlich sich
Der Sinne Reizesstreben;
In Lichtesoffenbarung mischen
Der Nebel dumpfe Schleier sich.
Ich selber schau in Raumesweiten
Des Herbstes Winterschlaf
Der Sommer hat an mich
Sich selber hingegeben.

Created for: The Rudolf Steiner Archive by:
The e.Lib, Inc. (c) 1990-2010

Friday, September 3, 2010

This Moment {Mr Froggy}

{this moment} - A Friday ritual began by Amanda at Soule Mama. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment you want to pause, savor and remember.

Thursday, September 2, 2010


Dear apple, on your branch,
please fall into my hat.
For if I take you off the tree,
They'll not be pleased with that!

Apples red and apples green,
please fall down upon the ground.
For if I pick you off the tree,
I cannot say how you've been found.

Apples here and apples there,
please fall into my hand.
My little sisters stand and stare
and wait for you to land.

Hips and haws and thistles tall
stand all around the tree.
All will soon be picked and stored.
Is there not just one for me?

Apples, apples, everywhere,
please let me have just one,
and just two more, please tree,
then September will be done.

Tuesday, August 31, 2010

Our Ekone Trip

We spent a wonderful weekend with some dear friends on Ekone Ranch. A wonderful time was had by all! Ladybug had a horseback lesson on Grasshopper, 25, who has trained many kids to ride, apparently including the instructor herself. The instructor was one of the most perceptive teachers I've ever met, she knew how to match the children with the horses, emphasizing that each horse had a different lesson to teach.

Ladybug is hoping to go to summer camp there next year. However if that is to happen, much saving needs to be had by all. It will be a lot of work for her, but very worth it.

Babybug had a great time throwing rocks, climbing hills, eating dirt (and ACORNS, oh my!), and getting carried by mama. Just he and I climbed a mountain. It was amazing.

We were treated to some amazing sunsets thanks to the forest fires in nearby Lyle.

My bestest friend's daughter has quite a fire for the outdoors. She was constantly catching bugs and frogs and investigating their magnificence. She also rode an amazing horse. I swear they are both smiling.

WeeFolkArt Giveaway!

Head on over to WeeFolkArt to be entered into a rainbow bean bag set giveaway! They have some really amazing ideas for crafts and fun stuff! Makes you want to own a scroll saw...

Monday, August 30, 2010

Calendar of the Soul-

Calendar of the Soul

[August 29, 2010 - September 04, 2010]

Twenty-second Week

The light from world-wide spaces
Works on within with living power;
Transformed to light of soul
It shines into the spirit depths
To bring to birth the fruits
Whereby out of the self of worlds
The human self in course of time shall ripen.

English translation by Ruth and Hans Pusch

Das Licht aus Weltenweiten,
Im Innern lebt es kräftig fort:
Es wird zum Seelenlichte
Und leuchtet in die Geistestiefen,
Um Früchte zu entbinden,
Die Menschenselbst aus Weltenselbst
Im Zeitenlaufe reifen lassen.

Created for: The Rudolf Steiner Archive by:
The e.Lib, Inc. (c) 1990-2010


A lot of fruits of the spirit born this week. We had an amazing weekend camping, with some enlightening experiences. Pictures later.

Friday, August 27, 2010

Busy Thursday

It's getting late. Or possibly early, depending on your perspective.

Thursday was Ladybug getting spacers for braces (the first half comes next week, the next set 10 days later). Then she and a friend went to the movies.

Taterbug and I cleaned carpets. This must be done again in a short time, I've waited far too long for it to be done, and now it's a disaster. It looks better tho, and his help was invaluable.

Saturday we are all going camping, half the family one direction, half the family the other direction, so tomorrow is planning and preparing. I would like to leave by 8am Saturday morning, the other half will leave much later in the day.

Friday I was supposed to work, but apparently there are not enough sick people, and so I was called off. Happy for the sick people, sad for my paycheck. Ah, well. Now, I'll get more done.

But first, I'd better get to sleep! See you all on Monday.

WIP-A weeks worth of knitting

I love knitting! Right now I have several things going (pretty usual!). This afternoon I rearranged the living room, and decided I needed a coaster. This is the end result (blocking), I think I'd like a second one. I have some yarn that is the same color as the teal in the heather which will become a second little coaster for the table next to my chair.

Here is a Tickle Hat for Tony. It needs a tassel and ear flaps. I'd like to be done soon because I have several more hats to go before Christmas!

These are some little finger mitts for Ladybug. I'll have a similar pair, only the main color will be turqoise, and Nana just might get some in green...

Very soon I need a list of things to knit or sew for Christmas. I'd really like as many things as possible to be handmade. A friend has promised me a scroll saw so that I can begin making some wood things, that is one skill I'm really looking forward to working on!

Sunday, August 22, 2010

I can do this...

...self development thing. Right now I'm working on not letting a certain person at work intimidate me. How is it that one person can cause me so much anxiety. My mom would say that I'm in control of my own emotions, and I CHOOSE how to feel. Now I need to figure out how to choose differently.

I do feel myself getting stronger, building new skills, getting more self-confidence. I can do this, and with respect to even those who intimidate me.

Calendar of the Soul

Calendar of the Soul

[August 22, 2010 - August 28, 2010]

Twenty-first Week

I feel strange power, bearing fruit
And gaining strength to give myself to me.
I sense the seed maturing
And expectation, light-filled, weaving
Within me on my selfhood's power.

English translation by Ruth and Hans Pusch

Ich fühle fruchtend fremde Macht
Sich stärkend mir mich selbst verleihn,
Den Keim empfind ich reifend
Und Ahnung lichtvoll weben
Im Innern an der Selbstheit Macht.

Last week:

I feel at last my life's reality
Which, severed from the world's existence,
Would in itself obliterate itself,
And building only on its own foundation,
Would in itself bring death upon itself.

And the week before:

In secret to encompass now
With memory what I've newly got
Shall be my striving's further aim:
Thus, ever strengthening, selfhood's forces
Shall be awakened from within
And growing, give me to myself.

August by Elsa Beskow


August-the time of ripeness,
the corn glowing
the berries all ripening.

The magic stands guard,
the bilberries,
the raspberries,
and gooseberries,
the red and black currants,
the whortleberries,
cloudberries and more.

They dance in a ring,
the Berry Queen smiling,
clad in her August array.

And the magpie-
he just watches.

For he's not interested in August.

He's hungry.

Simple Joys

We spent a few days with my uncle this last week, and had a wonderful time. His home is in the mountains, all built by his own two hands, and so peaceful. He walks his kitties every day, I would love a life like that!

The view from a neighbors cabin:

Charlie didn't want to keep his shoes on.

And then on the drive home we stopped and played in the Deschutes river.

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Charlie's Story

The following was written by me, to tell Charlie's story, not only to see the path he has been down, but to help heal myself. It is written in third person, as I was trying to avoid judging myself.

Charlie is the 3rd child of a couple who has been married for 12 years. He was conceived prior to their 10th wedding anniversary, and was a surprise. Mom was in school, and both parents had planned no more children. Initially, his entry was met with surprise and fear, but as the parents had time to adjust, his development was met with increasing excitement and planning.

The pregnancy was difficult for mom. Early pregnancy had trepidation about a genetic problem, which was not brought to fruition. Mid-pregnancy brought sacro-ileac pain, and later pregnancy brought contractions and an irritable uterus. Late in the pregnancy, mom developed symptoms of candida, but did not know what it was. Mom was not allowed to return to school while still pregnant, and Charlie arrived 5 weeks early.

Initially, he had difficulty breathing, and was lacking a suck-swallow-breath reflex. Breathing alone was enough work. Early labor was slow, later labor was faster. He had a small dip in heart rate during delivery. He was 7 pounds even and dropped slightly more than a pound during his first couple of weeks of life. The first 2 weeks were marked by a bad yeast infection on his skin and mom's breasts that took diflucan and creams to clear up.

Breast feeding was nearly impossible, his first nourishment being from a bottle, he did not seem to understand what breasts were for. Mom pumped for him almost immediately, even though he was too sick to eat. Over the next few weeks mom worked diligently with several lactation consultants and at home with kangaroo care trying to get Charlie to nurse. Mom became sad and disappointed, and a medication coupled with her history of breast reduction caused her milk supply to plummet.

Over time, Charlie started showing symptoms of allergies to his formula that he was being supplemented with. Dairy didn't work, neither did lactose free, and partially hydrolyzed. Eventually, the demands of pump-feed the baby-wash bottles-kangaroo care-pump, school, the need for sleep, repeated very large and painful plugged ducts, the constant recolonization of yeast, and loss of supply led mom to discontinue pumping and dry her milk supply.

As Charlie got older, his parents could not afford enough formula to get through the month. This formula cost was more than $10 per day. They attempted soy formulas, then later soy milk, rice milk, and almond milk. Over time it became quite clear that he was reacting to all of these substances, and only would be comfortable and sleep when just his main formula was given. Solids were introduced around 6.5 months, mom was careful to watch for allergic responses, none were noted.

Finally, mom finished school and was allowed some time to work in his health. Currently he is getting a few sips of water kefir daily and probiotics in his formula. He also gets some nourishing infusions diluted by half with apple juice about every other day. He is dairy free(except for butter), soy free, almond free, and only gets a few bites here and there of whole rice, but not rice milk. He seems to also react to the food additive carrageenan. His favorite foods are eggs, applesauce, bananas, sweet potato fries, arrowroot cookies, canned peaches, steamed carrots, canned corn, and dried currants. Mom tries to introduce other proteins but he often spits them out. Currently he is taking 3 types of enzymes once a day.

After a recent visit with a feeding specialist, a consult with the nutritionist, and a pediatrician, his formula is being changed to an elemental formula for those children with severe food allergies, malabsorption, and eosinophilic esophangitis. It is planned in the near future that he will see a GI specialist and an allergist. There is a concern that he may have environmental allergies contributing to his problems. There is also a worry that he may have some malabsoption going on, and the desire to make sure he does not have eosinophilic esophangitis.

Mom knows that the road to healing is long. This path has taken 15 months, and it may take that long or longer to get back. However, she has some grief, and feels some responsibility for his health, despite the fact that she knows in her head she did the best she could at the time.

Physically, Charlie is doing well. He is meeting most of his developmental milestones. He doesn't have any obvious constant words, and exposure to one of his allergies will set him back a day or two. Despite that, he is a sturdy, loving, lovable, cheerful, busy fellow who enjoys nothing more than a climb on the dining room table with his favorite teddy and truck.